How many contractors does it take to change a lightbulb?

Trick question, contractors don't change lightbulbs, their wives do, standing precariously on barstools and ladders while the kids run around at their feet because they get tired of waiting and not being able to tell if the shirt they are putting on is black or navy. Seriously. True story. This morning the kids and I had a LONG overdue lightbulb changing party! If I have to change the bulb in the ancient light fixture hanging WAAAAYY above the front porch of this old house ever again, I will scream. Just warning ya!